Yes, that is how long it took me to get this picture. This precious picture is all I wanted for my birthday this year, and I got it. There was a time I didn’t think I would ever get what I wanted, birthday or otherwise. I try not to think about the road traveled to get to this point and time, but today, on this rainy Sunday morning as I lay in bed with my 3 month old son sleeping in my arms and listening over the monitor to my daughter mumble in her sleep as she does the hour before she wakes, I go there, I relive it all in my mind. I find much easier to watch this movie now that I know it has a happy ending. I’ll give you the condensed version, as much as I can..
2001 – A not-so-special Specialist tells me I will most likely never conceive.
Late 2002 – Fate sends a long lost friend to my door with a request for a catch up luncheon. Over salsa the following conversation takes place.
Her – Why no kids?
Me – Can’t
Her – Bullshit
I take her word to heart.
2003 –Meet with another Dr. who says “We won’t know until you try”
2004 – Success! Joy! Heartbreak
2005 – Success Again, Hesitant Joy. Heartbreak
Ask Dr. Why? We start with the easy blood work test and go progressively more invasive, lengthy and painful. The final diagnosis? No physical reason, Fate has just dealt a bad hand.
March 2006 – Tom & I sit on a bench outside the busy mall in Las Vegas and have a heart to heart. Can we try again? Do we have it in us both as individuals and as a married couple to rally? We agree Yes, we can get up for one more round.
June 2006 – Success! Hesitant Joy. All looks good.
January 2007 – I see a onesie in Target that says “Worth the Wait” I cry, I want it yet I feel like I could jinx things to own it. My Mom goes back the next day without me and purchases.
March 2007 – We are so very blessed with our beautiful Annabelle. I tell myself this is all I ever wanted because I believe it is all I am ever going to get. That is OK.
April 2008 – Surprise!! We are going to be blessed again. What??? You don’t get what you want and then some, at least not me. Hesitant Joy.
January 2009 – Nate joins our family and my heart is complete. I never knew I could love this much, I never dared to dream this could be my life.
March 28, 2009 – I get what I wanted, a picture of me holding both my kids.
A visual reminder for me to be humble and grateful each day. A picture 8 years in the making.
9 comments:
I relinquish my crown of "breviloquence" to you. (Which I'm pretty sure means "brevity" plus "eloquence", but you'd have to ask SortaCrunchy Megan to be sure.)
Thank you for revealing that, in some cases, "Bullshit." is the response you need to hear.
My heart is just BURSTING for you Kristen. There's joy all over the place.
That is awesome Kristen! Congrats ten times over. I had it too easy conceiving Bella which makes me wonder what the good Lord was thinking. I worry about IF and WHEN we'd be able to conceive again. I should really count my blessings and your story reminds me that I should, every day.
Hooray! So happy for you! (you make some pretty babies!) :)
Your post made me cry! I'm so happy for you! Happy Birthday!!
Oh Kristen. What beautiful words, a beautiful story, and of course, beautiful children.
I'm so glad that you hung in there.
Happy hugs girl!
Happy Birthday Kristen! Beautiful photo. And you deserve every ounce of this happiness!
A long road, definitely--but you got two blessings at the end! What a beautiful picture!
I'm here via Jill and just wanted to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY and wow - what gorgeous miracles you have there. Gorgeous.
you're so cute! i teared up reading this and just wanted to say i'm so happy for you!!!
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